


Harry Potter and the DFAAA

by wolfysrevenge



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: (i.e. 6 year old Harry making a very strong argument against a doctor), 4am insomniac writing, Despite what it seems he will be friends with the twins, Food allergies and intolerances, Gen, Harry with a vendetta, Humor, Manipulative Harry, Polarity between mental and physical age, Smart Ass Harry, Timeline doesn't add up...yet, Written on a phone, accurate and inaccurate depictions of allergic reactions, ambitious Harry, and inconsistency in tone, contrariety of personality traits (a.k.a very little character development), drabbles with a motif, high-strung Harry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-07
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2019-03-14 21:23:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13598673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wolfysrevenge/pseuds/wolfysrevenge
Summary: If Harry had food allergies, how different would his experience at Hogwarts be. A lot different. Food was important after all. There needed to be some changes.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: this has been written on a phone and not edited at all. There are countless mistakes that I won't get to until I have a computer. I guess, I should first say, this is a compilation of drabbles, in no real order, for now until I can get enough written to create story with a linear timeline and coherent plot. 
> 
> Note: I'm writing this for my own amusement, but if you want to comment, feel free. 
> 
> PS: I have food allergies, several in fact, this is a way to make the best of it. My point, I'm not dismissing food allergies 
> 
> PS: I will need a BETA. PM me if you are interested. 
> 
> Disclaimer: Finally, I don't own Harry Potter, but it would be pretty funny if I did. 
> 
> Now, without further adiue. On with the, in no particular order, story-to-be drabbles.

**First Dinner**

Harry liked to consider himself a occasionally impulsive, but otherwise reasonably cautious person. The necessity of that caution had been instilled in him from a young age for a number a reason, but mostly it was because when he was young he was diagnosed with several severe food allergies.

And as the medical bills began to grow, so too did the caution regarding his food allergies. The Dursley's had reluctantly accepted that they had to be meticulous about Harry's diet lest they bring unwanted attention for the rapidly growing number of emergency room visits.

They instilled in him a borederline fear of foods that the test had shown him to be allergic to, minimzing the risk of his exposure due to his own intentional disregard for their impact on his body. As they had read, many children were known to do and they would have none of that foolishness. Not in their house.

Harry sat at the dinner table and in the Great Hall among a group of notably excited, newly sorted children at the Gryffindor. While the other new students chatted, freely and amicably amongst themselves, he could do little more than sit tensely and flinch everytime he saw food fly, from the mouth of a student, towards him.

He felt knots twist in his stomach as his nerves grew, while he watched anxiously as the children grabbed at food touching one thing before going for the next, liking there fingers before touching more food. This was clearly an unsanitary... and unsafe, he added to his mental list of complaints, when he caught an older student hitting the back of a choking younger student...eating environment.

But those weren't his biggest concerns. Well, they were second, but his primary and the most pressing concern was that they were mixing the food utensils. It was quite frankly, horrifying and unsettling. He felt his anxiety spike as he watched one kid grab a roll with a pair of tongs then use the same tongs to pick up a piece for chicken. He hadn't eaten yet and he already felt like he would be sick. This wasn't going to work. He could already tell that life at Hogwarts would be difficult.

* * *

 

**Blissful Ignorance or Blatant Disregard**

Harry noticed quickly that wizard seemed oblivious to food allergies, perhaps they dismissed it as irrelevant to them, perhaps, the were simply blissfully unaware of the extent of the problem, but it was clearly a issue that was unmonitored and being let to grow out of control.

In just the few weeks he had been here he'd lost count of the number of food allergic symptoms he'd identified as in the great Hall, but they just kept eating the food like they wanted to die. Harry shook his head as he watched 3 students student pass out face red and swollen, it looks like another few cases of a 'careless student prank' would be added to the list of reasons for healing ward visits.

* * *

 

**I'm Not Taking** **That**

This was not good.

Harry looked at his arm, as it flopped side to side, then looked at the potion he was being advised, quite forcefully to ingest. He understood why, he needed to take it, but the problem was, he had no clue what it contained.

He had yet to research magical ingredients to see if their were any relation between them and non magical ingredients in regards to allergic response, granted he didn't expect to find too much, but he would do his own tests and research if necessary.

He was pulled out of his thoughts when he felt cool metal press to his lips and he once again defiantly tightened his lips and turned his head. Yeah, having a lame arm would be inconvenient, but being dead was a fair bit less convenient, so he would take his chances.

The metal cup was placed to his lips once more and turned a glare at the healer madam pomfrey, but his stomach twisted slightly, at he felt the cool sensation of liquid touch his lips, and squeezed his lips all the tigher for it. He would have told her to shove off, but he wouldn't put it past her to take advantage of the moment and try to force him to swallow the potions, she was very persistent. He wasn't taking any chances.

Getting a glare in return from the mediwitch, he tensed prepared to turn away again seeing the hand holding the cup move, but he relaxed when he saw her place the cup down.

He sent the mediwitch a hesitant glance, then cautiously turned his head slightly away, and not so discretely wiped his mouth, 'just in case' he told himself, before he spoke, "So... You aren't going to make me drink it?" he questioned hesitantly, his voice small, but with an underlining defiance that left no doubt about his feelings about the situation.

Madam Pomfrey gave him a disarming smile... And he felt himself relax, slightly more. "Of course not, dear." She said sweetly, then not a moment later, before he had a chance to respond, she waved her wand and Harry felt something settle in his stomach.

Faster than his muscles should have allowed, he whipped his head over to the cup and his eyes widened in horror. The cup, hadn't move and was sitting innocently on the lamp table, mockingly empty. Just as quickly, he looked up at madam pomfrey with wide betrayed eyes.. 

Hethought he was being paranoid, but now was certain of his prior suspicions, they were all trying to kill him at this school. He sniffled as he mentally noted of how many people he planned to report for child endangerment, or negligence, or something else equally attention grabbing. 

He was going to start a union... the DFAAA. Dangers of Food Allergies Awareness Association


	2. Chapter  2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Character development, well, I'm not sure you can really judge the develop when there is no cohesion. 
> 
> I'm writing this for my amusement, but if you want to comment feel free. 
> 
> Disclaimer: Obviously, I don't own it, but I can have fun with it and I do.

**Hogswarts is going to kill me.**

Harry was hungry. He had been so off put by the display he witnessed at the opening feast that he couldn't make himself touch anything, let alone eat it. He shuddered at the thought. So here he was trying to get into the great hall, early, before anyone else so that he could have unfettered access to a relatively safe selection of fresh, unpeeled fruits that he may, or may not, still take to the nearest accessible sink and wash off.

You could never be too careful... or distrustful of others who handled your food without specific regard to your health and wellness needs.

He looked at the gathering of students that seemed to be growing as the minutes ticked by. A flash of red and gold, forcing it's way through the small, but growing crowd, caught his eye and suddenly he felt a little queasy, but calmed himself, by thinking how unlikely it was that they would feel the need to sit near him when the majority of the table would be open.

When the doors to the great hall opened Harry found himself more than slightly put off as the very reasonable conclusion that had managed to put his mind at ease, was disproven seconds after he sat down, and no matter how fast he tried to be, it seemed the others, older and more experienced, were faster.

Before Harry had had time to take note of what was available, the older students that had decided to sit next him for no justifiable reason, or at least not a reason he would listen to. Had touch nearly half of the available selection of foods. He heard his stomach growl.

He had considered moving to another section of the table, but he didn't want to appear rude, so instead with the attention of a hawk watching it's prey his eyes focused solely on the one thing that had avoided both direct contact and cross fire from the other students. Coincidentally, a basket of fruit sat dejectedly just out of his normal reach, but close enough that if he rose slightly he could just reach it. Rising to do just that he was about to reach for it when the older kid thought it would be polite to hand him an apple.

He looked at the apple, held by a greasy hand, that he was sure only moments ago had held a sausage, frozen and momentarily dumbfounded, as his nutrient depleted, and sleep impeded brain struggled to process what had just transpired. Then it clicked and his gaze slowly trailed from the hand holding the apple up to the expectant look of the red head holding the apple with a pleased grin on his face, and try as he might, he couldn't keep the look of horror off his face..

He knew it would be polite to say thank you, knowing that the older student had only been trying to help, but he was hungry and he didnt want to be polite, he wanted food. So he just stared while he tried to decide how to approach the situation, but his stomach broke the silence first. In quick succession it was followed by a stilted thank you, a tight smile and suppressed sob of longing as he ran from the great hall, already mourning, yet another missed meal, the sound of his stomach growling, trailing after him...

He would try again tomorrow morning.

Caught up in his depressing thoughts he failed to sense the eyes following him with a mixture of confusion, amusement, and curiosity.

* * *

 

**This can't be happening**.

Today, Harry was ravenous. Experience had taught those that knew Harry well, namely his family, that a ravenous Harry, was a fearsome thing indeed and an experience one should hope to avoid, actively if necessary. The dursleys considered it second, only to the demonic doppelganger that replaced Harry after having a non-fatal reaction to consuming something his body was allergic to.

So to say a hungry Harry was a frightening thing, well, it was weighted statement, to say the least.

So it was with an aura that quelled the appetites of more than a few students that Harry entered the great hall, intent on getting food even if it killed the students that managed to get seated before him.

He sat down at the end of the table, as far away from the other students as possible, and began to grab a few things that looked safe to eat, like the entire fruit basket that he had unashamedly pulled to himself and had no intention of releasing. He had even come prepared with a wet cloth to clean the fruit before he ate it. He had a game plan, he was prepared and he was determined to succeed.

Just as he was about to take a bite of his apple, a couple of rough housing students, knocked into him and he watched, distraught, as his apple flew into a basket of bread, and it was with a sense of dread that he noticed a banana laying in bowl of eggs, and another apple in a pot of oatmeal.

Slowly, reluctantly, Harry turned his eyes to where the commandeered basket of fruit had previously sat safely out of reach, to see a now toppled and empty basket.

As he watched the rest of the fruit roll across the floor, a fire, more deadly than fiendfyre began to grow in his eyes.

His food, he glanced briefly at the food once more, mournfully observing yet another meal being denied to him. ...They would pay. Fury blazing to life once more his head snapped in the direction of the two people, who had been so clumsy as to knock into him and noticed it was the same boy, and a second of him, from yesterday, there expressions something akin to a deer caught in the headlight... and something else he could read in his hunger induced rage.

With little thought to the consequence he punched both in the face before walking out of the Great Hall once more, hungrier that before. He was going to die at Hogwarts, he was certain of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I make no promises to post every   
> day, but I'll post pretty regularly, its a lot easier to do when its drabbles with a shared premise.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still hasn't been edited, didn't take long tow write either, so it has a lot of errors. 
> 
> Note: I don't think food allergies are something to be joked about in RL, but creatively expressing feelings and experience is entirely okay. 
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter
> 
> Warning: Food allergies are dangerous, don't take them lightly in RL

**Sweet Boy**

Harry was such a sweet boy,  
a one in a million find. Or so said everyone but the dursleys... But they we're clearly exaggerating...

Sure maybe they had gotten the short end of the stick to have a child with so many dietary restrictions, but to call him a nuisance and trouble maker, well there was just taking it to far.

Harry helped the teachers at school, offered a listening ear to friends going through hard times, reported kids who were being bullies. Most people liked him, although he did keep to himself, a lot. A little distant and more than overly cautious, but it was to be expected. He was a bit strange, but always polite.

So he was a strange, sweet, polite, cautious and helpful little boy, nothing wrong with any of that. Yes, the dursleys we're clearly exaggerating.

Of course, they argue that there was the time he convinced Dudley to eat a cookie that just so happened to have peanuts in it, which Dudley just so happened to be allergic to, but that was a complete accident, and the fact that dudley had been teasing Harry by trying to force him to eat food earlier, was pure coincidence.

He even apologized after, by getting him a batch of oatmeal raisin cookies from the school bake sale that same day. It was unfortunate that they had cinnamon in them. Dudley was allergic to that, too, but luckily he was already at the hospital, so he was fine.

And sweet harry was much more careful in the future, which was probably why Dudley was a lot nicer to Harry, too.

It was hard not to like such a sweet little boy.

**Bad Choices**

Harry had made bad choices before. 

Likegetting excited when he finds a new food brand and getting more than one in his excitement and ending up not liking it. Or like when convinced his aunt to make him a allergen friendly cake. To this day he wasn't sure if it was food poisoning or just poison that make the cake so deadly to his digestive system.

But none of that held a candle to this. He imagined if he tried to explain his reasoning to a doctor they would be him committed for evaluation. Harry had decided to go on a binge and eat whatever he wanted. It wasn't his first and despite what he said at the end of each binge, it wouldn't be his last.

He wasn't too sure, though. This one might take the cake for the most non lethal unpleasant experience with food he had had since his aunts allergen friendly cake. He felt like he has a concussion, had been hit by a bus and had food poisoning all and a horrible wrapped package.

He wondered if it was possible to report his brain for disorderly conduct in the work place...

Harry leaned into the toilet and threw up the contents of stomach, or possibly his stomach, for the billionth time. He was sure he would pass out soon.

Bad choices sucked.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Note: Doctor'sare human, too, so they aren't perfect, they just do the best they can and I appreciate the effort and I have nothing against doctors. 
> 
> However, sometimes it can be pretty frustrating when you go through a list of possibilities before getting to the answer.

**Doctor's don't know everything**

"How do you know it's food allergies", Harry asked unconvinced, while staring up at the doctor with all the condescension that a taller person could covey looking down.

"You were sure it was reflux last week, weren't you?" He glanced over to his aunt who sat quietly in the corner looking like she wanted to be anywhere else, hoping for her to agree, only to receive a blank stare... he wanted to sigh...She was useless. It seemed he would have to do this on his own.

He glared up at the doctor, trying to stare him down and while internally he acknowledged it probably wasn't very intimidating, he had already started something and he couldn't back down now.

"And before that it was food poisoning, and before that it was the flu and onset of pneumonia... Now your telling me that it's food allergies?" He asked incredulously.

"And you want me to believe you on your word." Harry looked at the doctor like a parent looked a child who denied they'd stole a cookie while eating it in front of them, with disbelief, exasperation and a tad bit of humor.

"There were some unfortunate, but minor, missteps and misunderstandings, but I'm positive of this, and you'll just have to trust me, alright." The doctor responded, though he looked to be talking to the petunia, who continued to impersonate a statue, silence and all.

Harry waiting patiently for the doctor to realize he wasn't going to get a response from his aunt, before growing impatient. "But I don't trust you, in fact, I'm worried about my continued health, let alone well being, under your care... Those minor misunderstandings resulted in emergency room visits... everytime! And you want me to trust you? No, I want want a different doctor.

The doctors face flushed red and his expression turned angry, "I...you...y-you can't do that! Your not the parent!"

Harry raised an eyebrow, "aunt petunia, I want a different doctor..." She didn't respond, but Harry had expected that, which was why he had a back up plan... "You know, auntie..." he started, his tone distant as if he were lost in thought .. do you think it's possible the reason why he can't figure out what wrong with me... " Harry ignored the doctors indignant huff, "is because of that freak-" a hand clapped over his mouth before he could finish the query, and look from the hand up to aunt's face, to meeting filled eyes he did and gave his aunt a lightly imploring, though she might consider it dark and threatening, look, as he gently pulled her hand from his mouth.

"Auntie Petunia, can you please tell this man that because of his 'minor' missteps, that we were ill prepared, when I had another episode, and that I've nearly died three times because of 'minor missteps, so we need a new doctor, or at least a better explanation than, 'trust me'." He asked with all the sweetness of Ethylene glycol(antifreeze).

Petunia stiffened momentarily but quickly collected herself, standing up straighter. She gave the doctor a quick once over then met his eyes, her with a look that clearly stated 'I'm not impressed'.

"My nephew is correct, we would like another doctor I had planned to wait until the end of the appointment, but if my dear nephew, want a new doctor now, then we want to speak to someone else. And if you can't then I suggest you find someone who can. You are making my nephew uncomfortable, you even raised your voice to him, it is completely unprofessional and you should hope I don't report you for you inappropriate behavior during this appointment."

Harry gave her a look that said 'I know your lying, and you know your lying, and you know, I know and that you are caught, but neither of us are going to say anything'. But she didn't need to convince him, and despite himself, Harry had to give it to her, she could certainly put on airs, and act a part.

It seemed Harry was getting a new doctor.

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I really need to put these in order, umm... First day of potions

**Potions class makes me hungry**

It was his first day for potions and Harry was admittedly dreading it. With a near palpable air of reluctance he dragged his feet to an open chair, his expression firmly set in a cross between sulking and kicked puppy.

When the professor entered only a few moments later, he didn't bother too look up from his self-imposed task of staring despondently at the desk. If the great Hall, or starvation, didn't successfully kill him first, this class would surely to do the trick.

He imagined it would be like cooking, frequent interaction with ingredients that could potentially pose a risk to him, or potentially even offset one of his allergies, he didn't know the extent of the overlap between magical and non-magical ingredients.

But that aside, thinking of cooking made him more hungry. The more he thought on it, the more desperately he wanted to leave to find food. He wondered if there was any other methods of acquiring food in this death trap. Maybe he could ask the older years... Surely if he explained the situation they'd be willing to help, or mock him endlessly as many kids had in the past, but he wasn't above trying, he was hungry enough to not care, if there was even a chance...

It was a sharp jab to his rib cage from the student next to him that brought him out of his thoughts. He turned a baleful glare on the girl who seemed to think he made a decent punching bag, only to see her point to the front of the class, which inturn, alerted him to the fact that the teaching was looking at him expectantly. After that realization he promptly gave his full attention...back to the desk, blatantly ignoring the teacher returning to his earlier thoughts... he wondered if they had a gluten free selection.

"Mister Potter. Our new... celebrity." Snape said in an antagonizing drawl.

Harry ignored him. He honestly didn't care about what he had to say. He'd need to look into getting and allergen friendly selection, and possibly a dedicated table, one could not live off of fruit alone. Well, he couldn't. Not if this school was to remain standing.

Snape continued, seemingly oblivious to the fact that he was being ignored. "Tell me, what would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?"

Harry continued to ignored him, it's not like he knew the answer, anyway.

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the beginning of a lasting friendship... You'd never know it, though.

**This means war**

It was official, he was done with his school and everyone in it.

He looked at the persons responsible for his predicament with eyes so accusing, they arrested, tried and imprisoned the guilty.

Without breaking eye contact, as if to make a point, he stiffly grabbed a napkin and wiped the Shepard's pie from him face before throwing the napkin down on his plate.

It was them again, the stupid red heads, it was always them and they each had 2 black eyes, a swollen cheek, and a busted lip to show for the numerous occasions they had felt his wrath, but they we're smirking at him with smugness in their eyes, and he was sure he saw a conspicuously inconspicuous high five between the two. He was ready for war, they wouldn't rue the day the incensed him.

With a deceptive calm he stood up walked out of the Great Hall and distantly noted many of the students sounding put out that he was just leaving, having expected another altercation, just before he walked out of the great Hall, he turned his head slightly to glance at the twins and it was with a sadistic satisfaction that he saw true fear in their eyes...

He smirked. Good. They should should be worried.

But for now he had to go to the infirmary. Some of the Shepard's pie had gotten in his mouth.

 

**Author's Note:**

> AN: Alright, I have another drabble already, I'll post that for a new chapter, when I have a few more to go with it I guess, easier that way, I suppose.


End file.
